Gotcha!!
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April 1st!
In real terms, Apple would never build anything like this. They don’t do open source for a start and they don’t do cheap. None of their products are cheaper than competitors so something like this would never be a reality even if this wasn’t an April 1st joke.
And if they did it would come in a molded aluminum enclosure and would have a Lightning port instead of direct pin access. 
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… don’t give them any ideas … a world of only apples is not without risks … remember what happened long time ago …
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Yea but now that Jobs is dead anything can happen. They built the Ipad Mini didn’t they!
And Apple Pencil is a thing now…
Exactly. A stylus! Something that Jobs would be turning in his grave about; they did.