I’m cautiously optimistic, but it looks like after a Microsoft update on my computer tonight I am no longer experiencing deployment problems in VS2012. Earlier tonight still I had to press the reset button almost before every deploy. Tonight my computer kept nagging me to reboot for some Microsoft updates. After I did this VS2012 seems to work a lot better. Hopefully this is not just a fluke.
It’s still not the same deployment speed as 2010 but it’s working now whiteout any big problems.